National Eating Disorders Awareness Week: My Story

Hey all!

If you didn’t know already, it is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week. Some of you might already know my story. But I am going to do a little recap for the new readers out there!

From as far back as I can remember, I have always had body image issues. I think this stemmed from a few different things, mostly my competitive surroundings in the competitive dance world.

Between the ages of 13 and 15, I was already restricting food, hiding or throwing away my food so I didn’t have to eat it, exercising more then a regular person and on top of it dancing 30 hours per week. By the time I was 15, I was losing hair, had big black bags under my eyes, dropped at least half my body size and had irregular periods.

This is only one side to the eating disorders I experienced.

When I quit such a strict competitive dance world and moved to easier surroundings where I could enjoy myself and actually experience life… (before this I haden’t had any sort of junk food, soda, anything other then “rabbit food”…I sort of went crazy. Something in me snapped and I just couldn’t get enough of FOOD! Glorious food.

I believe at this time I was also depressed for a great amount of my highschool/university years and ate the depression away, until I reached 220 lbs.

I would do really nasty stuff, like eat in my bed, order takeout 3 times a day (and eat all of it in one shot), hide food from roomies/parents (even though I was old enough to KNOW not to do this sort of stuff). I also never really reached out to many people during this time. I HATED going out with friends or doing anything in public. Literally, the though of it made me sick. I would stay in my room and not go out for days. I would lay in bed and shove food in my mouth, have it slop down me onto my bed and not even care. Now I know that is graphic…but it has to be said. I was depressed and did not recognize any of this at the time.

In may 2008, I decided that I needed a change from the unhealthy university student life I was leading, packed up my bags and moved home! I was depressed and recognized that I needed more help then what I could provide myself with.  I joined a gym and dedicated myself to eating clean. Since then, I have lost almost 40 pounds and am continuing this weight loss journey! I know I have a long way to go, but am so proud of my progress thus far. I needed my family, the support of gym team members, professionals and friends to get me through this battle. Binge eating disorder is crippling (just as all other eating disorders)…and I advise anyone who is going through something like this or suspects that someone they know is going through it…to talk to them about it, talk to SOMEONE about it!

This was me at 215 pounds taken February 2008

Here is my work in progress shot! Taken January 2009

and

hubba hubb! Myself and my wonderful boyfriend Lee. Taken New years 2009!!

Now this all isn’t to say that I never binge or have slip ups anymore. Nope. I do all the time actually. I’ve had several bad binges, slipups, made mistakes with my eating… Some days I binge, and other days I don’t eat enough. I still have my moments, but I am working hard to get my eating and weight in order, slowly, one day at a time. It’s not just the physical I have to change but also spiritual and mental.

Here is a little bit about Binge Eating Disorder, since I don’t think it is “out there” enough!

Binge Eating Disorder

First of all binge eating disorder is not about that second or even third helping of dinner! Everyone has a little extra food on occasion. This does not equal a binge.

Overeating like this on a daily basis while feeling ashamed about it and hiding it may lead to binge eating disorder.

Binge eating disorder is when you eat an unusually large amount of food frequently. It is a serious eating disorder along the lines of bulimia and anorexia.

People with B.E.D may feel ashamed about what they do and vow to stop but they usually can not resist their obsessions.

Symptoms of B.E.D

* Regularly eat excessive amounts of food

* May eat 10 000 to 20 000 calories of food in one sitting

* Debatable but serious binges last longer than 2 hours (even longer then a day)

* Can be a normal weight, over weight or obese (hard to tell who has b.e.d)

* When you have b.e.d it is the behavioral and emotional signs and symptoms that stand out: eating large amounts of food, eating when you are full, eating quickly during a binge, feeling that your eating behavior is out of control, depression, anxiety, frequent dieting without weight loss, eating alone, embarrassed to eat with or in front of others, hoarding food, hiding empty food containers, feeling disgusted by your eating habits

Causes

Biological: Gene and brain chemicals

Psychological: Low self worth, trouble controlling impulsive behavior, emotional, mood swings, anger

Sociocultural: Society’s desire for thinness,

Risks

* Most common of all eating disorders

* Up to 4 percent of USA population has binge eating disorder

* Most common in 40′s and 50′s

* Dieting may trigger urdge to binge eat

* Binge eaters may have trouble coping with emotions, feelings, stress and bordem

* Sexual abuse can lead to b.e.d

* Media and society play a role in b.e.d – desire to have the perfect body

Complications

B.E.D can lead to:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Panic attacks
• Substance or alcohol abuse
• Obesity
• High blood pressure
• Type 2 diabetes
• High blood cholesterol
• Gallbladder disease
• Heart disease
• Stroke
• Osteoarthritis
• Joint pain
• Muscle pain
• Gastrointestinal problems
• Headache
• Sleep apnea

If you think someone you know or yourself has b.e.d do not be afraid to reach out to family members, counsellors or doctors for help. If you would like to know more about my experience with b.e.d please do not hesitate to email me: jocelyneatsfresh@gmail.com…It is still something I struggle with on a daily basis.

Don’t hesitate to shoot me an email if there is somethiing you would like to talk about! Always here!